no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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