great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
