Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize