He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize