yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
