And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
