I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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