Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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