new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
