You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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