How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
