Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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