Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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