At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Randomize
