Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It's blow job season.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
