Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
