what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
