dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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