who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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