so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I just googled if crying burns calories
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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