is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
