Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
