We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
