just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
