The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
