Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize