I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
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