i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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