problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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