just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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