This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Randomize
