I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
