I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
