i just had sex bonerless
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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