that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I just had sex on a roof
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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