Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Two words: blizzard sex
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
