have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
