Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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