She announced her abortion via fbk
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
