If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize