my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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