I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize