Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
