I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
You ate ashes out of my bong
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
