all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
