I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
