thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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