So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
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