the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
