Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
